My D!ck Sucks - Lil Dicky

Hold up, hold the fuck up

Ain't you the YouTube rapper with the small dick and all that?

L-D

A-K-A Grip

Nah, no, not Grip

Well, I do have the game in the grip

(Hey) My dick sucks, my dick sucks

(Hey, hey) My dick sucks, fuck

My dick sucks, my dick sucks

(Hey) My dick sucks, fuck

Ayy, girl, ayy, girl

Ayy, girl, what you tryna say, girl? (Ayy)

When you see my dick, you may hurl (Ooh)

But I'm still kinda hot like May, girl (Hot)

Woah, girl, woah, girl (Woah)

I'm just tryna let you know, girl (Whoo)

My dick sucks for show, girl (Sucks)

But I make up for that like

Even if my dick is shoddy (Sucks)

Just sit there like it's gawdy (Hurk)

And it do good work like Gandhi (Hottie)

And I might grow more like Bronny

Probably not, got bitches in the lobby (Still)

Their body language obvious (Sex)

If five inches throw over, under

I'm underdog like Rocky

They don't care 'bout my cock (No)

I could use a pussy mop (Drench, woah)

On the radio like cops

She saw me and went in shock (Oh my god)

Technically I'm unemployed (Oh)

But I'm pretty sure I'm going to work

Stacking paper like a clerk

I got the Times writing blurbs

Y'all washed like shirts

Kid been balling, Nerf

They fuck with my quirk (Damn)

You see that girl over there? (Yup) She hope that I flirt

A-list actors first dates

How I got it popping on Earth Day

Ever since my surgery since first grade

I'm yelling

My dick sucks, my dick sucks

My dick sucks, fuck

My dick sucks, my dick sucks

My dick sucks, fuck

John's gone

John's gone

John's gone

We put John in the ground today

As I rap this song, he looks down on me

I'm just not, like, naturally, like, a rapper

Like I need to go to another place, to like—

Yeah, I don't know, it's like why do I need to escape reality?

But my reality is I'm good

I don't know, I just think even when my reality is good

I think too much about what's not perfect about that reality